unrequited.

i remember how during the beginning of summer,
we were too good to be true.
you wanted to know everything i did.
you wanted me to call everyday.
if i didn't, you'd start to wonder if i was forgetting you.

what happend?

i remember everytime you'd wake up,
you'd go online and message me.
you'd never let me forget how much you missed me
you'd even say you love me
you'd even tell me your dreams.

what happened to that guy in the beginning of the summer?

that guy wasn't afraid of showing that he felt something for me.
that guy wasn't afraid of showing that he needed me.
that guy wasn't aftriad of showing how much he missed me.

where is that guy now?

i dont know anymore.

its summer

a friend told me to just let you go.
have your fun.
we're on opposites sides of the world.
it just makes it harder for me to keep holding on to our lives together.
and so im taking his advice.
coz his girl is far away too.
im letting you go. its summer.
there will always be a me and you.
and when we get back, there will still be a me and you.
we're taking this break, its summer.
its not our normal life, its just summer.
auburn, our normal life, its coming soon.
and im waiting always.
i hope you will too.

please know that i miss you.
please know that i love you.
always.

my 19th

everything was just a huge misunderstanding.
i thought you were mad at me, you thought i was mad at you.
it just took one of us to speak up, and im glad you did.
the weirdness just ended there, we're back to what we were.
that just makes me really happy

19 today. i had an awesome first celebration of a weekend long one.
you called, you couldn't even wait till midnight though.
i was happy for you to be the first to greet my happy birthday.
i was happy to hear your voice after a long time.
i just wish you were here to celebrate this special day with me.
i just wish you were here by my side, always.

please know that i miss you
pleas know that i love you
always

please know...

i realized the day i left you in the airport that i dont know how summer is going to be like without you..
i knew i was leaving you but the thought never crossed my mind how hard it would be to for me.
i guess i just kept leaving the thought and thinking that im going home, i should be happy.
that day in the airport was the hardest day in my life.
i cried endlessly and my tears just wouldnt stop because all i could think of was everything we've done together.
i tried sleeping but i couldnt
i tried eating but i couldnt
i wanted to call but i couldnt
i was afraid to lose you during the summer
to come back to our lives in fall and have it like what we were before, just friends.
but then when i arrived, you're the first one i called.
and to my surprise, you were really happy to hear from me right away.
you said you missed me so much and that you want us to be together again.
so now we're in opposite sides of the world
and in the beginning we talked every single day
you even said you loved me and you know i love you.
you told be about your dreams with me in it.
you told me how much you can't wait for us to be back again.
and knowing that im not losing you this summer just gave me the peace and patience to wait until we get back
but now, things changed.
after one argument, one mistake, one disagreement,
you seem to not have the time to talk to me anymore.
im too scared to call you because i dont even know if you want me to.
im even too scared to send you a message, an email, because i have this weird feeling you dont wanna talk at all.
now i hate how im feeling that im losing you slowly.
that if i dont do something soon, il lose you forever.
and i hate how im so far away from you.
coz i feel so helpless.
please know that i miss you.
please know that i love you.